Monday, September 12, 2016

Love That Boy: What Two Presidents, Eight Road Trips, and My Son Taught Me About a Parent's Expectations by Ron Fournier

This book was on my radar because I heard Ron Fournier talk about it on Morning Joe and as the parent of a child on the spectrum I was interested. Then it was a book of the month selection so I grabbed a copy.

I cried more than once reading this book. I learned not to read book that makes you cry when waiting in an exam room for a checkup.

Something Love That Boy really drives home is that part of loving our children is accepting them for who and what they are. He learned that from his son Tyler after Ty's Aspergers diagnosis. His wife pushed him to take the time to bond and get to know their son on this new footing and it was really lovely.

It isn't easy as I know all too well. I have to remind my husband, who I know loves our son J very much, when he tries to reason our son out of a repetitive string of speech. Just recently I door knocked for a political candidate and J loves this kind of thing and was ranting that it would have been better to do than to be in school. He was saying it in varied ways over and over and my husband tried to tell him that he needed to be in school because that's important. He missed the point. J knows he needs to go to school, in fact he is a very, very good student. He was just expressing how cool this activity was and how much he wanted to go. But until his differently wired brain was done with the thought he needed to say it. I have learned to allow this stream while my husband was trying to reason it away. We too are differently wired and I have spent more time in this special needs world and my husband is still using his regular way of parenting. It is a learning processes.

Fournier learned this from his road trips with Tyler, talking to experts, and hearing from other parents. He stops looking at Tyler through the eyes of his expectations and learns so much about not only Tyler but about himself.

Love That Boy is moving, interesting, honest, and a love letter.

(Finished September 12, 2016)

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

The Rosie Project (Don Tillman #1) by Graeme Simsion

Don is not like most people. He is "wired" differently.

Reading this book was interesting for me beyond the story itself. I am the mother to a young person with Autism. While my son isn't as rigid in his life as Don is there are areas where rigidity is an issue and so reading Don's story was like insight into my son's mind. Granted my son is 10 and not on the search for a life partner, yet. But when we are given Don's inner dialogue and his reactions I can see my son in many of them.


The Rosie Project grows out of The Father Project which grew out of The Wife Project. In the search for Rosie's father Don learns he is capable of love even if his ability to express it is different. He also learns he is able to change his behavior without changing who is he, a lesson we can all benefit from.


Something I found interesting here is that no one tells Don, nor does Don ever say that he is Autistic, specifically Aspergers. Even as he works on a project related to the diagnosis he doesn't see himself in the description. Others hint at it to him but no one ever comes right out and says it.

At the heart this is a love story of the kind that believes there is someone for everyone, but it is more. It is a story of how different is not bad, that even those who don't fit into traditional societal norms, who have less than ideal childhoods, who are just "fucked-up" as Rosie would say, can find love and fulfillment in life.

It took me a little while to get into this book but in hindsight it wasn't the fault of the book, it was that I was awaiting the next book in a series I love that was coming out the day after I started this one. Then I put this aside to read the other book and then had a few days of not being able to get the other story out of my head, I sometimes mourn in a sense the ending of a book I love. But then I was able to get back to this one and was pulled in and really enjoyed The Rosie Project.

(Finished September 7, 2016)

Thursday, September 1, 2016

A Torch Against the Night (An Ember in the Ashes #2) by Sabaa Tahir

What a brilliant book!!!! Tahir does something that not many YA authors do, she treats her reader as if she knows they are smart and capable of enjoying a book that makes you think, a story that toys with stereotypical characters but upends them. No one is all good or all bad. Her "good guys" are imperfect and their flaws are on display. Her "bad guys" are more than they appear on the surface.

The story is interesting and exciting. Be warned, she has shares something with George RR Martin, a friend and I were discussing this series and she called it "Martinesque". If you have read any of GoT you know what this means, but you will love and hate characters anyway, trust me, I speak from experience.


In this installment we get a new chapter perspective, Helene gets some chapters and it is really good to see where she is and what she is facing as she does and not just because Elias was part of it. It adds a lot of depth to the universe of Ember.

As with the first book I already miss the being in this world and anxiously want book 3, yes, we are left knowing there is more to come. I am not telling you anything specific because I really don't want to spoil anyone, this is the kind of story you want to discover as you go and then talk to people.

Just know that we spend more time with Elias and Laia and they each grow and discover what they are truly made of. Helene is a really interesting character and not at all one dimensional. She is a lot more than the Mask that grew up with and had Elias' back. And the nasty Commandant, she is just as nasty as ever.


Really a brilliant series!!

My review of book 1
(Finished September 1, 2016)