Trans Mission: My Quest to a Beard by Alex Bertie

I tried to read more about the experiences of the "T" in LGBTQ because it isn't an area I am super informed about and I wanted to learn more about what it was like for people willing to educate and share their journey. The best way to learn is to hear from first voice story tellers.

By the end of this book I felt a kind of love for Alex. He was so open and willing to tell his story with the hopes of being helpful to both the parents and loved ones of Transgender folks and to young people beginning the coming out process and who might be wondering what is ahead for them in the transition process. Alex doesn't just give facts, he is open about what he knows and doesn't and how to best deal with what ever "it" is for the reader, how much to share and with who when is just one example.


Alex writes as if he is having a conversation with the reader, and it makes it easy to empathize with him, the only thing missing is a steaming cup of amazing coffee and a plate of cookies.

I learned a lot and found this a great way to end pride month.

(Finished June 29, 2019)

Ship It by Britta Lundin

I LOVED THIS BOOK!!!

If you have been part of a fandom, if you have ever read and/or written fanfic, if you have ever shipped, if you have ever longed to see someone who looked like and/or was like you as a character in the the thing you love, if you know what it is to love a thing even when others don't get it or think you are nuts (midnight Harry Potter book release parties anyone?), this book is for and about you!!!!


Claire is an amazing young person. She is so many people I know from my own fandom experience and it was lovely on the page. She is a fanfic writer and her fandom of choice is a show called Demon Heart. She ships the two main characters Smokey (Forest) and Heart (Rico). She, like many fans of the show, ship the guys and that's what she writes in her stories. She lives in a small town in Idaho and is lonely. It's a very small town and she is the only one who is obsessed with this show and writes about. She has no friends other than one girl she talks to on the bus to and from school. She had a very bad experience with a young man from her school the year before our story (she wasn't raped but he was very disrespectful of her body and touched her in unwelcome ways). Oh, and Claire isn't sure if she is Queer, she is trying to figure it out because she meets a girl names Tess who she starts have all kinds of feels for.

When Claire goes to a local Comic-Con and overcomes her fear and asks a question about the upcoming Demon Heart finale and if the fans hope that their shipping of Smokey and Heart will become cannon Forest handles it in what becomes a PR nightmare. To fix the problem the shows fixer type person sets it up so Claire comes on the rest of their Con tour (Portland and Seattle) with them.

She gets to spend time with Tess, Forest, and Rico. She learns about herself and how to see past herself. She also gets an inside view of some of the nastiness of show business.

This book is a love letter to fans, fandoms, and those who even in these close knit groups still feel marginalized, it says you are seen, you have a voice and you should use it because you are worth seeing and hearing.

There is also a lesson/reminder about respecting others and apologizing, making amends, when you screw up and hurt someone, and making sure you are looking beyond your own nose. Oh and a very strong message that if you are a fangirl or boy, if you ship characters, write/read stories about them, plaster your room with posters, go to Cons, do Cosplay, don't do Cosplay, YOU ARE NOT A FREAK!! Well maybe you are but you are, we all are a little bit, but IT IS OK TO BE A FREAK!!! "Normal" is overrated and boring!! Imagine how drab and awful a world with out Harry, Ron, Hermione, Luna, Bilbo, Gandalf, Frodo, Samwise, Luke, Leia, Han, Jon, Arya, Sam, Dean, Castiel, (fill in your favorite) would be....



(Finished June 26, 2019)

The 57 Bus: A True Story of Two Teenagers and the Crime That Changed Their Lives by Dashka Slater

This is a true story and let me start by saying I remember when this happened. I also have some vague memory of reading a followup story about how the person who was burned had shown or sent a message of forgiveness to the person who did the burning. Then I saw this book on a table at work and knew it had to go in my Pride reading bag.

Oakland

Sasha

Richard

The 57 Bus

A lighter

A skirt

Mothers

A father

Bystanders

Many lives changed


When this happened both Sasha and Richard were teenagers

Sasha identifies as agender but upon looking at them to Richard saw "a boy in a skirt" and he made a poor choice. He was with friends and they were laughing at Sasha who was asleep on the bus on their way home from school. Acting recklessly Richard set Sasha's skirt on fire. He said he didn't think it would burn so fully so instantly and that it would smolder and wake Sasha up. But what happened was that Sash'a legs were horribly burned. It would have been so much worse had a quick thinking passenger acted and got the fire out.

In the aftermath of the fire is a story of recovery, criminal justice, compassion, forgiveness, and the capacity of humans to change.


Slater does a brilliant job of telling the story in such a way that you can feel for both teenagers and see the trouble with punitive justice without any restorative piece, especially when it comes to juvenile offenders.

Nothing makes what Richard did ok, and he has owned that and even tried to tell Sasha and their family, though it took 14 months for the message to reach Sasha and their parents because Richard's lawyer held on to letters he wrote. But being 16 and having no history of being a violent kid should he have been tried as an adult? Some stupid statements he made to the police when he was arrested, using words he didn't fully grasp the meaning of, because he didn't have an adult with him during questioning, means the DA was able to try him under CA law as an adult and there wasn't much that could be done to stop it. The discussion I feel like Slater was trying to open was about not if a kid should get off because they are a kid but how they should be treated in the criminal justice system.

But the most powerful part of this whole story is the graceful forgiveness Sasha and their parents were able to show to Richard and his mom and how that helped Richard on the road to being truly rehabilitated and avoiding recidivism.

(Finished June 24, 2019)

Stonewall Riots: Coming Out in the Streets by Gayle E. Pitman

This is book is technically a kids book and it is a great introduction into the history of the Stonewall Riots and the movement for LGBTQ+ rights for kids. There is no explicit information that might make caregivers worry about age appropriate content but it still gives really important information.

The history given is done by taking the reader on a journey of 50 objects. Each object (a photograph, a button, a patch, a newspaper article etc) has historical significance and the story of the object and the people involved is taught.

But this isn't just for kids at all. It is a valuable and interestingly done primer for anyone interested in learning more about the people and events surrounding the 1969 Stonewall riots.


It is a super quick read, I read it in a little over an hour.

(Finished June 23, 2019)

My Fairy Godmother is a Drag Queen by David Clawson

As with all fairytales, and make no mistake about it, I think this is a modern fairytale, it requires some belief in the unbelievable, in the happily ever after, in the power of love, that the good guys win, the boy gets his hearts desire.


My Fairy Godmother is a Drag Queen is a twist on the Cinderella story. There's a person, in this case a teenage boy named Chris, who lives with his Step-Mother and two step siblings, a boy and a girl in this telling, who does the cooking and cleaning and care taking in the household. The story even starts with a ball Chris wants to go to but can't even as the others get ready to go and hope that his Step-Sister Kimberly gets the "prince" J.J. to fall in love with her and solve all the money problems they have. There is an awesome Drag Queen-Fairy Godmother, Coco, who gets Chris to the ball...and there is a shoe left behind....

But there are some modern twists. Chris is gay, his step-mother has a drinking problem, he loves his family, in his way, and they him in their own way, and he likes to cook and stuff and they don't make him. And the run in with the prince and the left behind shoe? J.J. and Chris.


What follows is a story about learning to love the skin your in, what it means to have pride in who you are, the power of friendship and love, being fabulous, the ways we love each other and how it doesn't always look like we think it should, and sacrifice for others and when to put self first. There is also some uncomfortable moments, hiding oneself from others and how that can hurt people even if that isn't what we want to do, the Kimberly/J.J. pieces were a bit uncomfortable but sad too.

Overall this was a great twist on an old classic and I loved reading it. I felt for Chris so much. And I even felt for Iris, if she could stop drinking to hide her pain I think she would find her step-son and her kids are pretty neat people. I found the way Buck acted towards Chris and Duane a little "icky" at first but when it became clear he loved Chris and liked Duane quite a lot and was trying to in his own awkward way show his support I felt better. It may not have been the most "appropriate" way to show his love and support but it was his way. And you get the feeling both Chris and Duane are ok with Buck.

A solid 4.5 out of 5 but Goodreads doesn't do half stars. A very good read tho!!!

(Finished June 22, 2019)

When Brooklyn Was Queer by Hugh Ryan

This was a fascinating read. Being from Brooklyn I was extra interested in this not just as a Pride month read.

It is the history of Brooklyn and its rise as a city and then part of NYC, how the Brooklyn Bridge and the subway lines being being built and the activity at the Navy Yard played major roles in the development of the borough and the growth of the Queer community in Brooklyn. It is also ties in the history of the growth of the arts (theater, museums, drag shows, artist communes) in the area.

It is one of not many books documenting the growth and tearing down and driving into the shadows of the Queer community in the decades of the lead up to the Stonewall Riot. The reason that there are not as many books documenting this history and the stories of the people of the time is that there wasn't much preservation of information in the early years because people didn't think to save or document things and also because of the way the Queer community was treated and dismissed. Often times the stories are lost in the mix, for example at one point being Queer was considered criminal and the tracking of the arrests weren't always properly coded and so the statistics of how many people were arrested for crimes that weren't crimes but discrimination isn't fully known.

There is mention of literary greats/legends Walt Whitman, Truman Capote and other artists and performers too, and how their ties to both Brooklyn and being Queer played a part in the history of research and life in Brooklyn in its heyday and as things changed and crumbled.


It really was an interesting read. I learned so much about my hometown, those who helped build it, the awful way members of the Queer community were treated (and sadly still are), and the huge part both celebrity and average, everyday people were treated for being who they were born to be. Yes a lot of the history is ugly and sad but it is so important to know.
I learned about February House, the role Coney Island played in the life and development of Queer life, the creation of MoMA, how Brooklyn was born, the Navy Yard and sailors in the area during WWII, the differences in how gay men and women were treated or looked upon and judged (hint-almost always unfairly), the part the mafia played in the clubs and restaurants that catered to the Queer community and just so much. I highly suggest you read this.

(Finished June 19, 2019)

The Music of What Happens by Bill Konigsberg

This is a beautiful story about some ugly stuff. It is such an important read. It is a lovely and gentle falling in love story between two young men, Max and Jordan, and that is why it made it into my June #Pride reading. But it is so much more, it contains such an important message, and it is a must read for teens/young adults of all genders and sexualities.


Max is a 17 year old half-Mexican jock, he plays baseball on his school team. His dad has drilled it into his head from the start that boys must "superhero up" and not cry or be soft, shouldn't feel is how Max heard this. He lives with his mother and sees and talks to his father from time to time. He has two best friends, Betts & Zay-Rod, and they call themselves the Three Amigos. He is an artist when he allows himself to explore that part of himself. And Max is Gay.

Jordan is also 17. He is a white, skinny reed of a kid without an athletic bone in his body. He is a writer and loves 80's music. He is a writer and has two best friends, Pam & Kayla, who he calls his wives. Jordan lives with his mother and has been taking care of her since his dad died a few years back. And Jordan is Gay.

Something happened to Max. Something he is trying to get over because that's what he thinks real men do. Jordan and his mom are thisclose to losing their house. And then they meet. Jordan and his mom are trying to get his dad's for truck back up and running so they can earn the money needed to save their house. Max stayed out all night and part of the consequences he is facing is having to work all summer in the insurance office where his mom works. So when Max (who can cook) stumbles across Jordan's food truck as his mom (who can't cook) is having a meltdown it is like fate and he gets a job working on the truck.

That is the catalyst that brings the boys together. But as they try to make a go of this food truck the depth of them is slowly revealed.

Jordan's mom has a serious gambling problem and is depressed. She hasn't been a caregiver since the death of Jordan's dad, they have reversed roles. The relationship between Jordan, Pam, and Kayla is his safe place. Until he begins to feel like they aren't listening to him and are doing things he isn't comfortable with. It's nothing huge but it is part of the larger topic of consent and agency over oneself that this story tackles, and does well.

Max's dad is a classic example of what has been coined "toxic masculinity" and Max wants to please his dad. So when something happens to Max instead of facing what it is he falls into "the man up, it can't be what I think it is because I was bigger and stronger and I didn't fight or try to get away" mentality that many people who have been bullied or otherwise assaulted deal with. Usually it is girls/women but in this case it is a boy. Max went out with a college guy, one who was built much smaller than him, and something happened. Max doesn't want to talk about it or deal with it but the physical memories keep at him. And when he does finally talk about it the conversation becomes about consent, no meaning no, and how disassociating and not fighting back doesn't mean it isn't rape.

The details of the assault aren't given in a graphic manner but it is discussed. There is a brief exchange about how the body can react in a way that makes a survivor wonder if they "wanted it" and it is done with love and tenderness by Max's mom.

This revelation starts a dialogue between Max & his friends and Jordan & his about how they treat each other, the stereotypes they apply, and the right they each have to their feelings and what they allow to happen or not happen to them, from dressing up someone's dog or labeling them your "wife" all they way up to the big one, a person's body.


While it is a difficult and emotional to talk about these things, it is handled so well here. There is a bit more, shit hits the fan with Jordan's mom and he has to face some hard choices and realities...

This is such a loving and amazingly told story!!!

(Finished June 12, 2019)

Putting makeup on the fat boy by Bil Wright

Carlos is fabulous...more so in his own mind than in anyone else's but he is truly fabulous. He is funny and sweet and a whiz with makeup. He wants to not be a burden to his mom, he wants to be a good friend and brother, he wants a boyfriend, and he wants a job doing makeup at Macys. He is really good at it, makeup artist to the stars kind of good.

While Carlos has some run-ins with the world that doesn't understand or appreciate a gay boy who loves heels, makeup, cool purses, and great clothes for the most part he is comfortable in his skin. Carlos chases his dream and in the process doesn't always make the best choices. He isn't a bad kid at all, just very human. And he pays the price for his mistakes, in one instance damaging a friendship and having to figure out if he can ever fix it.

Putting Makeup on the Fat Boy is Carlos's journey towards finding out who and what he is made of and it is so awesome that the main character is the kind of kid written off in many books as the sidekick of the straight main character. Carlos will make you love him and cheer for him even when you shake your head at his choices. You know his heart is in the right place.

(Finished June 10, 2019)

Brave Face: A Memoir by Shaun David Hutchinson

I feel like no matter what I say about this book it won't be enough to express how important, moving, powerful, heartbreaking, beautifully written, and filled with hope it is.

Shaun David Hutchinson tells his story of coming to realize he is gay, what that means, how to feel about it, how it fit in with his depression, his suicide attempt, and his coming to terms with a life that hasn't been easy but thankfully is still being lived. To lay open ones struggles and faults out in the open is one of the most courageous things a person can do and Shaun does it without trying to make himself out to be anything other than what he was and is. There are moments of being able to see his sense of humor even as he writes about the pain and suffering he is feeling. There were moments I just wanted to hug him and tell younger him to hang in there, he will make it, and will be a writer someday, a published in real books and not just on the internet writer.

I was so impressed with the level of detail he gives his reader about what he was feeling both about himself and others. What was so heartbreaking was how he was so sure that others were thinking awful things about him, from his looks to his personality, mostly because society had so ingrained it into the minds of people that being Queer was a dirty and ugly thing to be. No one judges Shaun as harshly as he judges himself and it leads him down the path of trying to end his own life.

I feel like no matter how much I go on it won't be adequate so I will just say READ THIS BOOK!!!

(Finished June 9, 2019)

Kings, Queens, and In-Betweens by Tanya Boteju

Pride reading continues. This time with a fiction.

Kings, Queens, And In-Betweens is an interesting tale because it is more than one thing, it isn't just about a young woman and her dad in the aftermath of her mother taking off, it isn't just about the complications added to a friendship when one of the people in the friendship is going through stuff they don't have the words for yet, it isn't just about the awkwardness and mess that can be meeting someone you like a lot, it isn't just about the drag scene, it isn't just about figuring out how to feel and deal with a body that doesn't quite fit....it is all of this.

Nima lives with her dad and we meet her a year and a half after her mother has left her and her dad without wanting or any idea of where she is and why she left. Nima has a best friend named Charles and meets and bonds big time with drag sensation Deidre. And there is also Gordon who isn't Nima's anything anymore but once was her friend but he is around and hurting and vulgar and lonely and mean and feeling broken. Then there is Jill who was Nima's parents' bestie and is somehow connected to her mom leaving. In the community of drag clubs, performers, and audience, Nima finds herself wanting/needing to be a Drag King. Oh, and Nima likes girls, well one girl in particular, once she meets Winnow that's it, game over, she has fallen hard! But oh the joys of being young, inexperienced, and socially awkward!!! Nima makes a little bit of a muddle of things romantically.

So much happens to Nima at once. I don't really know how to explain it other than to say that there were times when I felt the writing or story line was just too, well too...but really there is so much depth and emotion in Nima's life (story) that what ever it is that I can't put my finger on didn't make it hard at all to love Nima and her world and be pulling for her every step of the way.

(Finished June 6, 2019)

This Book Is Gay by James Dawson

This book is a how-to, self-help, personal growth, everything you need to come out manual. It is also the book you need to read if you love someone, parent someone, are a caregiver to someone who has come out or you suspect will be. And it is also the book you need to read if all you want to do is be a better ally to your LGBTQ+ friends, family, coworkers, neighbors, or the community at-large. It will provide you with some deeper understanding on what it is like keeping in mind we who are cis and straight can't fully understand how they actually feel.


Dawson does a great job infusing real, deep, and much needed truths and information with humor and reminders aplenty that the way you are, the who you are, the label or lack there of you choose to attach to yourself, it is ok, and you are awesome!!

As a parent reading this I glossed over the chapter on sex or as he calls it "sexyfuntime"reading the parts on the statistics and the non-mechanics stuff. I did this not because I am repulsed or have any issues with sex between people of the same gender in any way, but because I was reading this as mom looking to better understand and support my 13 year old gay son and I didn't want or need to images of the mechanics in my head. Just like kids don't want to think their parents every have "sexyfuntime" parents don't want the image of their kids doing it in their heads either.


The love and respect Dawson has for his reader and their differing steps in their journey is beautiful. His humor and honesty are refreshing. And this is the "stereo instructions" we all need to read!!

(Finished June 2, 2019)